Fairy Tale Creatures as Adults

As a child, I loved playing princesses and assorted fairy tale creatures. It was fun to pretend and make-believe. As an adult, not so much. The part of being the adult I don't enjoy is being obligated to be the make-believe creatures.

I HATE the tooth fairy! A close second is the Easter Bunny. Thank heavens I don't have to be Smokey Bear or I might jump off a cliff. Santa is a marginally different matter. He, I can handle.

I am a terrible tooth fairy and have forgotten multiple nights in a row. I'm much better at handing them a dollar when the tooth falls out. When my oldest lost his first tooth I was going to do it differently. He got a box of crayons, no money here! The next one he got a coloring book. It seemed to work out pretty well until he went to preschool and another child received money. His gifts, tho more expensive, we're NOT cool. I'm still a cheap fairy and refuse shell out more than a dollar for any tooth. And, I won't pull them. It gives me the creeps when they come out in my fingers. Being obligated to sneak into the bedroom at night, find the tooth that hasn't stayed under the pillow, replace with a dollar, adequately dispose of the tooth, then head to bed, just doesn't excite me. By the time all the kids are asleep, the last thing I want to do is pretend to be fairy.

The bunny has to be a close second due to the fact it's only once a year. I love Easter weekend because it was always a holiday I could spend at home with my kids. Over the years that's changed. I love the meaning of Easter and the resurrection. But why the silly rabbit? Dying the eggs and a hunt is fun. But again with the creature! I'm not a big fan of loads of candy. With 6 kids that's a whole lot of sugar and hyper energy. Not to mention money that's quickly ingested. Once my kids got a little older we moved away from the traditional baskets and Easter clothes. In years past they've gotten camp chairs, pillows and sheets, sunglasses and mugs. This year I ran out of ideas. Today I had to make a run to Family Dollar and see what I could scrape up. The pressure to be a "good" bunny is ridiculous. But, I think I pulled it off.

Easter this year consists of: a new laundry basket, water balloons, chapstick, squirt gun, goggles, a 2 liter of soda, cheese balls and a few chocolate candies. Nothing riveting but all things I don't usually buy.

The unfortunate part of tonight is that I have to be BOTH creatures. Oh yes, we had to lose a tooth today too.

Fighting From the Other Side

Aren't these good lookin kids? Every one of them deserves a mom to fight for them. Thankfully, all my kids now have one.

I want moms in my situation to have a voice.

I'm a mom of 6 kids on an every day basis. Three I gave birth to, three I gave my life to. I love all 6 of my kids in their own special ways. This is the culmination of a lot of work and love for years.
Just over 3 years ago, my unbiological kids unexpectedly moved in. It was definately the best thing for them but it took a lot of adjusting and work. Our household doubled in a couple of hours. Within a week they were enrolled in school, settled in the house and permanent residents. After a few months you could already see a dramatic change for the better.
What these 3 needed was a mom who was going to take care of them like they deserved. They were now fed regularly, attending school, supervised and stable. There were a lot of issues to deal with and overcome but you could see the changes. They now had parents who were willing to fight for their right to be a kid.

I know of people who are trying to put their lives together and get their kids back. I know of some who aren't fighting but feel entitled to their kids.
What I want is for moms like me to have a voice from the other side. I want to be able to tell a judge about the struggles we've had for years because of custody being in limbo. The one who has "parental rights" but doesn't care to be the parent except when it suits their needs. Kids go thru such despair and heartache when promises are broken or birthdays and Christmas are forgotten. There are times when it's easier to cut all ties. There are kids who are better off without the hit-and-miss parent.
I am the mom who is willing to fight for my kids. Fight for their consistency and stability, even if this means less parent time with the one who has "parental rights." Parental rights is a fancy term for still being on the birth certificate. These kids are MINE. I feed them, teach them, wipe their tears and celebrate the successes. I'm the one who puts limits on behavior, rewards for things well done and makes them feel special. I'm the mom without parental rights. But, that doesn't make me any less of the mom.

I want moms like me to have a voice in the system. We're the ones who pick up the pieces and put them back together creating a child. We do this over and over again as the other parent pops in and out of their lives causing drama and chaos. There isn't anything about my situation that I would change. But I would like to save another mother from watching her kids hurt while being powerless to help. I would like judges to know what happens after their decision was made. Lets improve these decisions.

This mama bear isn't done fighting for her kids. All 10 of them. And any other child who needs someone to fight for them.

Family

Love this job

Have I mentioned in the last 5 minutes how much I love being in nursery?

I have fallen head-over-heals in love with every single one of the little munchkins in our ward. And, I can't wait to have more little ones come in!

I was called to be a nursery leader around September. I've never been in nursery, even when my kids were little. I've stayed to help or fill in when needed but never week after week.

After a few months it was my turn to teach. All of the leaders take a month that works well for them. Since I was the new person I watched for a while until I got the routine down. Last month is was my turn to teach. I missed a week so someone filled in. I figured I'd teach an extra week.

But . . . I LOVED IT!!!

So, I decided not to give the manual back. I've been teaching this month too. Why, because I love it.

On Sunday afternoon I look at next week's lesson. I read through it and jump on to the Sugardoodle website. (I adore this place.) There are fantastic ideas on there as well as coloring pages and clip-art. Monday and Tuesday I mull over the lesson and come up with a theme. I put this theme into the lesson, coloring page and *drum roll please* our activity. Let's be honest, in our group of 14 kids, there are probably 3 kids that can sit and color nicely for more than 7 seconds. We need an activity to occupy time instead of gettin out the toys again.

Our first week's theme was having a healthy body. I like to have the kids participate since it keeps them interested. I use file folder activities and have every child match one piece. This file folder had things that were healthy for our body. Then we sang a silly song about growing up. We sat down and pulled out the coloring page. I've found that simple pages are better. For the activity I made peanut-butter play dough that we molded (smashed) onto a paper with a body shape on it. Since it was made out of edible ingredients, we didn't sweat the 18mo babies eating it instead. Successful first lesson.

The second week we had a jelly bean theme. I couldn't find a file folder lesson so we posted paper jelly beans with pics them onto a big poster board. The kids got a jelly bean to eat after they had helped so nicely. Then came out the standard coloring page. I had put a poem relating jelly beans to family (thanks Sugardoodle) in a heart on a 2nd paper. We used white frosting as glue and put jelly beans around the heart signifying loving our family. We did have some paper licking and lots of jelly bean consumed but it was fun.

Since I got a feeling that my food activities weren't necessarily approved of I thought I'd switch it around a bit. The next week's theme was Prayer Bears. I found a cute file folder game on prayer and all the kids participated twice. We sang a song intended to use "teddy bear" but changed it to "prayer bear." Time for coloring page. I made 6in bears filled with wheat for each child. It was a good way to rotate 20lbs of wheat! For our activity we glued eyes and buttons on our prayer bears. This one was a huge hit! The next day at a basketball game one of the moms told me that her daughter hadn't put her prayer bear down. Ugh, melt my heart. (pic of prayer bear at the beginning of this post)

I still haven't given the book back and we're well into December now. I don't intend to either.

This week's lesson is on having a family forever. It took me a little while to come up with a theme for this one but I finally got it. Building blocks. My sweet husband is going to draw me a big picture of a temple on poster board for the lesson. After he so willingly helps I'm going to cut it up into squares (blocks). We'll build our temple and family. We'll have the same temple on our coloring page. Then, I've made a set of little wooden blocks for each of the kids so they can build their own family around the temple. I'm pretty proud of this one.

This week has been a week from hell. We've had no fewer than 3 activities for multiple children every night. Tuesday I was ready to throw in the towel. I had 145 basketball jerseys delivered to my house 2 hours before they had to be handed out. My daughters had a dress rehearsal and I was helping backstage. AJ was performing in the show. Dallon had a basketball game as well as Kason. Rob had home teaching appts during this time. When all the kids were in bed and I looked at the homework I had to correct I knew I needed a little time out. I ignored everything that had to be done and started working on my nursery lesson. Some might think that it's just one more thing to add to my stress but it's not. It's something I love and enjoy. Taking that half hour and coming up with a theme was exactly what I needed. I needed the simplicity of the lesson, the strength of the gospel and a reminder of the children's uncomplicated love for everyone. It was this one moment focused on my nursery lesson that has kept me moving the last 2 days.

I need these little people more than they need me. I know my testimony grows surrounded by the simple lessons and love in nursery. They are a light of the Gospel in my life. I'm beyond grateful for my calling and the wonderful parents that support us. I'm grateful that my husband supports me and is willing to go to Sunday School alone. By the way, have I told you how much I love nursery?

Confirmed Craziness

As I was diving into the daunting task of organizing Kanab Boys Youth Basketball, I asked my mom, "Am I crazy?" Her response was priceless. "Ya but now you're just manufacturing reasons to be crazy." Yup, thanks mom! I've manufactured a good one this time!

There are 2 main reasons I do this to myself every year.
The first being that I really enjoy basketball. I've grown up in a gym and love the sounds and smells. There's nothing quite as exciting as a great shot in the last minutes of a game. A good man on man defense is fun. Can I play the game? Definitely not! I'm terrible, really, terrible. Although I do have great technique. Can I coach the game? Yup. Been there. Done that. Loved it.
The second reason is that I have a lot of my Dad in me. No matter how busy he was, he wouldn't want a kid to miss out on an opportunity. I want the 130 boys that signed up this year to have a great time and learn to love the game. The boys deserve an opportunity to succeed.

This is where I start manufacturing my craziness. I'm a little (ahem, a lot) OCD about organization. I have a file box that is ONLY for basketball. In my box are few manila folders containing a mirage of things. All registration papers are done by alphabetical order in each grade. Practice schedules, volunteers, team rosters, insurance, Jazz contacts are included in these manila folders. Ok, maybe I have more than just a few folders. All of the information that I have must be shared in a clearly organized manner. This is just the paperwork part of it.
Now we move into the gym. The coaches that have so gracefully volunteered must feel at ease as things run smoothly. Every night I close up the gym, the floor must be swept. Once a week the bleachers are pushed in and swept. I know how much it costs to refinish a gym floor so we keep it as nice as possible. Besides, it was fun to sweep the gym floor as a little girl. My dad taught me that's what you do before leaving the gym, so that's what I do.

Tonight I had a few people thank me for stepping up to the plate and running the league again. Honestly, I kinda like it. It's my way to give back to the community and kids. I'm grateful I have a reason to be crazy. Thru basketball I feel very connected to my dad. It's a game he loved so dearly and I can be a part of him.

If you see me around town and I'm disheveled, haven't showered in days, and babble at you, please remember that I'm a little basketball crazy. Give me a week or 2 and I'll come around.

Daddy's Girl

I'll be 2 years tomorrow that my daddy passed away. Some days I can't believe it's been that long and some days it seems like yesterday.

My dad was my Superman. He is/was my hero. As the kids and I were talking the other night, they were expressing what they would like to achieve as adults. When they asked I responded, "I want to try to be half the person my daddy was." My dad was kind, gentle, patient, genuinely interested in us, a fighter, gave everyone the benefit of the doubt, happy, stubborn, had reasonable limits, generous and most importantly, loving.

I remember so many nights that we'd shoot the bull and watch Sports Center after I returned from a date or activity. He would be in the stands watching dance performances, diving meets or softball games. There would be cards placed on my pillow congratulating me on a job well done if he had to miss something due to other obligations. Or the flowers left on the counter top with a note since he'd have an out-of-town basketball game on my birthday. He cared and made sure we knew it. Don't get me wrong, we had our moments. We stood toe to toe in a disagreement neither wanting to back down. We were more alike than not and our stubborn sides would clash every blue moon. Then again, I was a teenager. Even though we didn't see eye to eye, I still had to obey the rule: Give Daddy a Kiss on the Cheek Nightly. Some kisses were a little icy but I would give almost anything to give him more nightly kisses.

I miss my daddy's smell, his hugs that make you feel like everything is ok and his voice. I'm sad that my boys won't have him in the stands at their sports games cheering them on. I wish he was in the seats at my daughters dance performances. My dad knew all the dance terminology and how to do most of the moves. See, I told you he was interested! I would love to cuddle up next to him and talk basketball/baseball/football/tennis/track...you get the idea. I wish he could have been coaching as SUU got an invitation to the Big Sky Conference. Although we all know he was involved in that from the other side.

I aspire to emulate my dad in my life. To bring out all of his great qualities he passed onto me. I know he was proud of me when he passed away and I'll continue to make him proud. I'll continue his legacy and teach my children of the great man he was. I will always hold my head high as one of the "Hodson Girls." There is a man in town that knew my dad and calls me STEVE since he doesn't know my name. The man has appologized for not remembering my name but I told him it's the greatest honor to be associated and remembered as my dad. I'm honored to be Steve to this man.

As I cry and hurt during this hard time of year I'm grateful for our gospel. I'm grateful for eternal life and the opportunity I have to be with my dad again. I know he visits me and watches over us. I know he's surrounded by family and friends. He probably golfs every thursday and is in a softball league with his buddies that have also passed on.

I miss my dad.

Steven Lloyd Hodson Dec 11, 1954- Nov 3, 2008

Run, Run as fast as you can...

There are a few things in our lives that we've taken up since the last post. I've been sleeping, which is HUGE! And Rob, Kason and I have started running.

I'm not a big fan of running (think swim team) but Kason decided we should run a half marathon in January. So, we bought the shoes and started with just a mile and a half.

Our official training starts on Monday but this last week I've been running alone. Kason has been sick with strep and Rob has been a little occupied with work. Maybe I'll have partners again next week. I'm pretty sure I'll be doing this alone since my son commented the other day "Mom, maybe I overestimated how far a half marathon really is." Ya, the kid is bailing on me. Rob works long days and hence misses a lot of the training.

On the other hand, I could get used to this sleeping idea. I've tried to be really good at getting to bed just after 10. It's been kinda nice! Sleep, huh, who knew?! My kids have been really cute and helpful. They helped pick up my room so I could rest in a clean room. They were willing to be quiet Friday and Saturday nights so I could get to bed. There are days that it's a little rough to get to sleep but overall, a great improvement. The kids did cute little things. See the glasses on the M&M pot? My bracelet was the dog collar. Sweet kids and a very supportive husband!